Change
They say that the only constant in life is change. Everything is bound to change. I guess we all know that but somehow we hope that by trying to avoid thinking about it or acknowledging it , the painful change that is slowly creeping into our lives will go away. Perhaps change can be mitigated once we stop thinking about it.
Similar to the idea of mind over matter? You think that your circumstances have not change and that it's all in your mind. You hope and wish that maybe you are over-thinking it and that in reality and actuality things have not change to the point that it has become alien to you. At least that is what you hope it is.
But sooner or later like an incoming hurricane ,it hits you and all that you're left with is questions. Questions of why, what and most significantly how in the world did you allow such unrecognizable changes to happen to your life. A life in which you are supposed to be the master of your destiny. The captain of your world. The life in which you are given the wheel to steer. Any direction.Without limitation or restriction.
The outcome you get? is the realization that you are only human and it is difficult and sometimes even heart breaking because you can't steer life without changing it. And that sometimes conscious effort is needed to make changes for the best, for the future, for yourself and for the best of others, the people you care about the most. Knowing, with every single. inevitable change. the package of consequences which comes along is going to be filled with questions of 'what ifs' and the constant nagging at the back of your mind .Of things you should have done and things that you shouldn't have done. Just to make the changes that occurred bearable and also maybe to make sense of the dissonance that is heavily weighing on your psyche.
But I figured that's just the human condition. Perhaps change is needed for us to know what matters to us the most. Maybe it takes change to know who are the people that matter to you the most and maybe just maybe, If we are lucky enough we would be given a second chance to go back and relive those memories in which we were the most happiest. The most content. A chance to live again. To breath again and to experience the reckless abandon as a child would in the meadows. The things that we felt when we were kids before the recognition that we would not stay kids forever. Before we got to know that life is not always about pink cotton candies, funfair , carousel rides, rainbows and hop scotchs.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
Passion
I have been living the campus life for the past one and the half years. Today i came back to that life after a blissful month of holidays. Then it all begins, all over again like a carousel. For the next 13 weeks this would be life.
I came back to Singapore and attended to the work I needed to get done. Whilst in the midst of doing all the work and discussing issues regarding our lives in hall I was reminded again why i do the work I do in hall.
The people I work with are so passionate about the work they do and it actually gives me hope. Hope that good people STILL do exist and that there are people,though not many who STILL cares about others and are willing to do everything they can to ensure that the community that they are involved in, gets the best out of their tenure and efforts.
Of course this would all be a naive assumption, but sometimes all we have to do is choose to believe in the goodness of people. Faith , that there are unselfish deeds and work and actions that people are capable of achieving and executing. I think we all need that little dosage of faith cause faith brings about hope. Besides I think that with all the negativity in the world, faith and hope will do our souls good because sometimes all you need is a little hope which enables us to keep trying and keep believing in the things that we are passionate about and perhaps most importantly to continue doing and pursuing our passions. Especially when the fruits of our labor is not growing nor showing any signs of growth.
I came back to Singapore and attended to the work I needed to get done. Whilst in the midst of doing all the work and discussing issues regarding our lives in hall I was reminded again why i do the work I do in hall.
The people I work with are so passionate about the work they do and it actually gives me hope. Hope that good people STILL do exist and that there are people,though not many who STILL cares about others and are willing to do everything they can to ensure that the community that they are involved in, gets the best out of their tenure and efforts.
Of course this would all be a naive assumption, but sometimes all we have to do is choose to believe in the goodness of people. Faith , that there are unselfish deeds and work and actions that people are capable of achieving and executing. I think we all need that little dosage of faith cause faith brings about hope. Besides I think that with all the negativity in the world, faith and hope will do our souls good because sometimes all you need is a little hope which enables us to keep trying and keep believing in the things that we are passionate about and perhaps most importantly to continue doing and pursuing our passions. Especially when the fruits of our labor is not growing nor showing any signs of growth.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
A day to go
It's amazing and strange at the same time , the feeling you get when the holidays are about to end and that you have to go back to routine and lead the life that you ought to live. Not because you actually enjoy it but because it's the safer choice.
Speaking about safer choices, a degree doesn't guarantee you anything anyway. You just end up being like everyone else. Qualified to get a job with a different range of pay that is... and that is SUPPOSE to make all the difference and add meaning to the tertiary education that everyone is fussing about. I just wonder if it really will matter at the end of the day.
Speaking about safer choices, a degree doesn't guarantee you anything anyway. You just end up being like everyone else. Qualified to get a job with a different range of pay that is... and that is SUPPOSE to make all the difference and add meaning to the tertiary education that everyone is fussing about. I just wonder if it really will matter at the end of the day.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
the beginning
I figured that its a new year and i should do something that i would never ever in a million years thought of doing. So viola, I decided that I am going to start blogging. For sometime now, people have been asking me to blog and I never understood the reason why people spend time blogging about their lives.
I have always been critical about the motives of people writing about their personal life for the world to view and comment and you know inevitably make conclusions about you and your life and your realities. Having said that I think its the human condition to have our voices heard, to matter to someone out there who took the time to read the words we want to say but somehow was unable to do so for various reasons and perhaps the feeling of peace we get when we express our thoughts and speak about the life we lead.
So people have a myriad of reasons to blog .I think if i were totally honest with myself, the reason i decided to blog is because aside from the obvious fact that i love writing, it is because writing is a huge part of me and I need to write to keep my sanity from the world and people i deal with everyday. I have been writing since i was 8 and I still do write. Not electronically though, I have a journal i write in and I must say it's a pleasure to go back to it (the journal) every once in a while to relive old memories, lessons learned in the past and also to rediscover the person who wrote all those previous journal entries and see if she is the same person as she was in the past.
So here is to a new beginning,of writing on the net though i still intend to keep writing in my manual, old school journal where i use a pen and a book .. I like flipping papyrus and looking at my handwriting. I am a narcissist that way =) only cause i write for myself and no one else.
I have always been critical about the motives of people writing about their personal life for the world to view and comment and you know inevitably make conclusions about you and your life and your realities. Having said that I think its the human condition to have our voices heard, to matter to someone out there who took the time to read the words we want to say but somehow was unable to do so for various reasons and perhaps the feeling of peace we get when we express our thoughts and speak about the life we lead.
So people have a myriad of reasons to blog .I think if i were totally honest with myself, the reason i decided to blog is because aside from the obvious fact that i love writing, it is because writing is a huge part of me and I need to write to keep my sanity from the world and people i deal with everyday. I have been writing since i was 8 and I still do write. Not electronically though, I have a journal i write in and I must say it's a pleasure to go back to it (the journal) every once in a while to relive old memories, lessons learned in the past and also to rediscover the person who wrote all those previous journal entries and see if she is the same person as she was in the past.
So here is to a new beginning,of writing on the net though i still intend to keep writing in my manual, old school journal where i use a pen and a book .. I like flipping papyrus and looking at my handwriting. I am a narcissist that way =) only cause i write for myself and no one else.
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